It’s getting on nearly a year since I bragged wrote about my son getting ready to potty-train. And, as most of you probably predicted, but were kind enough not to say, the universe punished my hesitance to embrace potty-training by giving me a child that only teased me with regular, but inconsistent, potty-use for months afterward.
His interest waned and because we believe in the lazy man’s child-led potty-training method, we occasionally put him in underwear when we were around the house, only to have him pee all over the place and not show the least discomfort or distress despite being soaked in urine.
So. Loud and clear, universe.
Forward to one week before the approaching third birthday. The previous weekends had included numerous attempts at regular potty use with limited success. And then the universe relented and the boy was suddenly interested AND motivated (the golden ticket, in my opinion). He had finally decided that diapers were annoying and gross. Voila! Potty trained!
Since then we’ve had minimal accidents and it’s mostly been smooth sailing (KNOCK ON WOOD). A win for half-assed parenting! Take that, universe!
We celebrated by eating cake.
Three and diaper free, baby!
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On that note, I’ve been thinking about something that was brought to my attention recently, which is the suggestion that parents share too much on Facebook about the mundane details of their (or their child’s) lives. I believe the concept extends to blogs and other forms of social media, too. You’ll have to read the article to get the full extent of the issue (original article here).
While I totally get that the routine events of child-rearing may not be fascinating to childless people, what I do not get is the aggressive and offensive response. It’s Facebook, for crying out loud, not the New York Times! Shouldn’t a person have the right to say what they want on their own Facebook profile (or blog)? People who don’t like it don’t have to read it. It’s easy to block a person on Facebook.
Yes, there is definitely such a thing as tact, and perhaps sometimes day upon day of cleaning up bodily fluids can desensitize a parent to what is appropriate to proclaim for all the world to see. But really? We’re going to get up in arms about poop?
Listen, childless people may not get this and I don’t blame them if it seems like a dumb thing to get excited about, but potty-training is extremely important. As is the first time your child smiles, or the first time they sit unassisted or the first time they eat real food. Parents get excited about developmental milestones because it’s evidence that we are successfully raising our children to become independent human beings, which is supposed to be the goal, isn’t it?
You may not like to think about it, but at one point someone had to change your diapers, too. Someone celebrated when you learned to use the toilet, and not just because they no longer had to deal with shitty diapers.
Potty-training is one of the last major hurdles on the road to a child’s physical independence. Yes, I know we still have to provide food and shelter and remind our kids not to pick their noses. We still have to see them safely through childhood and get them educated and keep them from turning into potheads. But using the toilet signals the end to a child’s reliance on adults for keeping his or her body clean and it shows that the child is ready to take responsibility for his or her  bodily functions. Is it crude or impolite to talk about this? I don’t think so. As much as it might make people squeamish or want to roll their eyes, every step along the road of development is worth celebrating and parents should have the right to discuss it on Facebook or their personal corner of the internet.
No one is telling people without children that they have to like it or find it captivating. But I hope that those without children can learn to appreciate that some things are part of the human life cycle and, like it or not, as fellow humans they are a part of that cycle. Just because you may not understand something, does not make it wrong. And just because something seems uninteresting to one person, does not mean it can’t be highly significant to another.
Unless we want a generation of adults wearing Depends or drinking from bottles, a victory on the potty is a victory for us all!
(Yes, she looks like she’s yelling at him here, but she really wasn’t. And just seconds before they were sitting there with their arms slung around each others shoulders and it was just so cute!)
