Oh yay! It’s a bullet post! I know you’re all thrilled. Random things I feel the need to say to the internets:

• This morning my kids were screaming for me because there was A WORM! A WORM!!!!! in the living room. I told Avery to get a kleenex and kill it. She wailed frantically firmly declined. So off I went to kill the little worm.  When the kids showed it to me I practically had a seizure. There was an effing SIX INCH LONG BLACK WORM IN. MY. HOUSE!!!!! I then maintained my composure and disposed of the creature joined my offspring in hopping around and shrieking OMG A WORM!!! A WOOOOORM!!!! How did such a gigantic creepy crawly infiltrate my home without detection? And sweet sister mercy, what if there are more of them? 
• My son has hit the gun phase. The gun phase being the stage of life when every stick or cardboard tube or really just about any random object becomes an imaginary gun which he shoots at everything and everyone yelling “Kiw! Kiw! (Kill, Kill)”. It doesn’t matter that we have no toys guns or that we consistently tell him that guns can hurt people and we never shoot people and that it isn’t nice to play at killing, he nods his head compliantly while planning his next sniper attack. It’s not something I expect we’ll be able to reason him out of. Generations of my pacifist Mennonite relatives are turning over in their graves. 
• Someone told me today that I looked too young to have two kids. I almost made out with her on the spot. It’s nice to hear that when you’re seeing the sharp rays of 30 glimmering on the horizon.
• OMG A WORM! A WORM! A WOOOOOORRRMMMM!!!
• I was recently possessed by the spirity of Betty Crocker or something and baked about 10 dozen muffins and and probably the same number of cookies. Many went into the freezer to bring out in the weather when turning on the oven seems like cruel and unusual punishment.  But I need to make something that’s not sugary and dessert-ish. Any suggestions for food that’s meal quality and freezes well in individual portions? I’ve made a bunch of hamburgers but I am feeling the need to store food as though we’re preparing for armageddon and we’ll be hiding underground for months on end. Don’t ask me why. It’s just the crazy manifesting itself. There are worse ways to demonstrate your lack of sanity so I’m just going with it.
• FYI: Homemade popsicles = best scam ever. Kids don’t care about the difference (at least not yet) and I’m not the sucker buying $3 popsicles for my kids every day after school! (Yes, that bastard is once again parking his/her ice cream truck with it’s siren’s call right in front of the school each day.)
• My best friend had a baby last week and I’m pretty much climbing the walls with wondering how it’s going and wanting to snuggle the cutest baby I’ve seen in a long time and NOT BEING ABLE TO because we live 5000km (3000mi) from each other. Despite the word getting “smaller”, it’s not yet small enough to let me skip over to munch on chubby newborn limbs and be home for dinner and for that, I will never forgive the universe.
• My lack of posting has been due to the fact that we crossed the border to Canada for the first time since we entered America last June. It was a whirlwind weekend and we had a good time. More to come on that once I get my pictures uploaded and edited.
• DID I MENTION THE WORM????