Young love strikes again. Avery and her “special friend” COBE, or Child Of Boundless Energy, (yes, this one) have formulated a plan. Because my daughter is nothing if not completely anal about planning. Which I suppose is a good thing when it comes to family planning. So behold the plan hatched by two five year olds…
Translation: We will marry each other. Then we will have a baby. After that we will feed it. After that we will give it a nap. Then we’ll go to a baby shower. Then we will play with it. Then we will go shopping and we will buy baby clothes and we will buy baby shoes. Then we will dress it. Then we will change it’s diapers. Â (And the sticky note: We will name it too.)
The sticky note was glued on for good measure because we wouldn’t want to forget the all-important step of naming the infant. Â The two of them came up with this “plan” at school and as soon as we got home Avery set to work to put it in writing. Because once the young man has made promises she’s not going to let him get away with any monkey business. They have a contract, dammit! The documents were brought to school the next day to be viewed and ok-ed by the prospective husband and father and with the teacher’s seal of approval as witness (a pink sticky note with her thanks to Avery for sharing her story in class), life as we know it may never be the same.
And so, with a plan in hand and a husband and child in her future, my daughter can happily relax and enjoy the next ten years of her life. Because she’s pretty sure she needs to be at least fifteen years old before she has a baby.
EEK! I’m hoping she’ll come up with another plan before then. Maybe one that involves university? Or perhaps her fairly recent fear of childbirth will resurface before then and she’ll change her mind. Otherwise a glimpse into my future would reveal a lot prescription medications and a large glass of wine. Lots and lots of wine.
March 26th, 2009 at 1:10 pm
I am laughing so hard now I can barely type! Oh my, kids are such eye openers! I love it! Best of luck to you with this, and your teenage mom-to-be
March 26th, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Oh my goodness! I love it/dread the thought of it. She’s going to love you so much for posting this…
March 26th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
A few thoughts come to mind:
First, wine is clearly holy (look it up, it’s in the bible), so drink up sister!
Second, if may add a legal perspective, I’m pretty sure that no binding contract has been nor ever will be signed with ‘love’. Blood, sweat, and tears yes, but never love. And thus you have a pretty strong case to get this document thrown out in court.
Your other alternative is sitting them down and showing them a breakdown of exactly how much it cost to get married and have a kid, and how that would impact their current savings plan (aka allowance, aka stream of candy supply)…
works everytime!
good luck
March 26th, 2009 at 10:42 pm
Bwaaaaa-ha ha!!!! Too freaking funny!
To look to the bright side:
1.Be thankful she’s waiting for a decade and not proceding with her planned Motherhood right now.
2.And she’s got the right idea with a prenup, but perhaps could use a little guidance in other topics that should be included (such as who’s gonna do diapers, late night feedings, laundry…I only wish I had a prenup with those things outlined!)
3.Avery’s writing is excellent! I didn’t need to read your translation at all. (love the spelling!!!)
Thank you for sharing this gem!
March 27th, 2009 at 6:19 am
Wow, Avery never ceases to amaze me!
I bet you have fun showing her these “documents” when she grows up (the “peanut butter survey and the “marriage contract”). Lol. And I agree, Avery’s penmanship is really excellent, especially considering her age! 
March 27th, 2009 at 5:50 pm
Wow! That girl is an amazing writer, just like her Mama. I guess I can start calling you Oma S.
She sounds like she brings a lot of joy to your life and has certainly been observing life with a baby.