In light of Her Bad Mother’s recent experience while trying to nurse her baby on a WestJet flight, I felt compelled to add my voice to the chorus. Here goes:
Dear WestJet,
No doubt you are just beginning to realize your blunder in not acknowledging the nursing mothers of North America and their rather compelling voices. You have often chosen to ignore them and it’s eventually going to kick you in the ass if you don’t smarten up. Here’s what you need to know about women who breastfeed on airplanes:
1. Women who travel with small infants are often tense and anxious to the point of feeling physically ill (or maybe that’s just me?). Travelling with a baby is exhausting and stressful and most of us are conscious enough of our fellow passengers to know that they are all eyeing us and praying they won’t be seated anywhere near the woman with the scream machine wailing infant. Our own rights to travel with our babies are often drowned out by trying not to offend those around us with our noisy little companion. Or by the less than pleasant welcome we receive by fellow travellers. We have been conditioned to feel that air travel is for childless adults, no matter what your airline’s “policy” is.
This attempt to be considerate of other people’s comfort is degrading. It makes us feel like second-class citizens and we are already having to deal with the fact that we are responsible for twice as much luggage, carry-on and passengers as most other travellers. We also have to give up our right to having a seat to ourselves during the flight - we are obligated to share our seat with someone who has no concept of personal space. We forfeit the chance to tune out for the duration of the flight with headphones, televisions and newspapers/books/magazines as our attention is usually required every. minute.
Nursing our babies may be the only small relief we get during our time aboard your aircraft and your interruption of that process is nothing short of inhumane.
2. Most of us want to be discreet when we nurse. That means different thing for different people. For some that means covering with a blanket, for some just trying not to flash our breasts too gratuitously. Despite your insinuation to the contrary, most of us really don’t want to attract attention while we’re in such an intimate and vulnerable position. But your insistence on trying to mandate how we feed our infant is completely inappropriate for several reasons.
- First, do you know how LONG it takes some of us to learn how to breastfeed? It can take us months to work out a system with our infant that works for us. Sometimes it’s painful. It’s always draining. Now we’re stuck in an unfamiliar setting with limited space and we’re trying to make it work as best we can under the circumstances. You can’t imagine how very unhelpful your comments are in this scenario.
- Second, have you ever tried to breastfeed a baby that doesn’t want a blanket over their face? Some of them REALLY HATE IT and keeping them covered while nursing is like trying to make ice cream on the surface of the sun. Futile. Offering us a blanket does not make your suggestion any less offensive. It just showcases your ignorance. A nursing mother will HAVE a blanket if she needs one. She even knows how to use her words and ask for one if she has forgotten hers. You don’t require other passengers to cover their faces while they eat, stop trying to interfere.
- Third, we really don’t need to remind you of our right to breastfeed our baby in public without being harassed, do we? If it makes other people uncomfortable it’s YOUR JOB as a flight attendant to remind them of the nursing mother’s rights, not to encroach on those rights by asking us to cover up.
3. In this day and age, when science and medicine bombards mothers with the reasons why we should breastfeed our infants, your subtle message that nursing is somehow obscene is akin to telling your passengers to forgo seatbelts because they are inconvenient. All that buckling and restraint! It makes other passengers uncomfortable! They don’t want to watch you and your awkward seatbelt! Your buckling up is not appropriate in public! But we still think you should use that seatbelt in the privacy of your own vehicle, don’t get us wrong!
We are under incredible pressure to breastfeed and for many of us it is a hard choice to make. It is a choice we make gladly because it’s best for our children, but it is not without a price. Contrary to popular belief, nursing is not always easy. Some mothers sacrifice a hell of a lot in order to nurse their children and when companies like WestJet try to invalidate our decision by treating us like we are shooting a pornographic video in seat 12B the message is hard to ignore.
So here’s what you need to do. You need to formally apologize to Catherine Connors at Her Bad Mother. And you need to mean it. If WestJet wants to be known as a family-friendly airline or, for that matter, an airline that supports basic human rights, you are going to have to change your strategy. You are going to have to train your employees to be the champions of human rights, rather than the hounds that nip at the heels of women who are already dealing with a whole world of pressure. Teach respect and tolerance and the basic dignity and rights of all humans and you will be rewarded with the kind of customer loyalty and advertising that you can’t buy for any amount of money. Because mothers? They talk to each other! And our voices can get pretty loud, as you may remember from your own childhood, MR./MISS JACK. ASS. WESTJETOWNER! YOUSMARTENUPRIGHTNOWYOUNGMAN/LADY!!!
We aren’t asking for more than you offer your other passengers. Our needs are just a little different. Offer us the respect you give other travellers and you will find you will be well rewarded. Your reputation hangs in the balance!
Regards,
A Travelling Mother
