Ok, maybe y’all misunderstood me. When I asked you to enlighten me on the cultural differences between Canadians and Americans I wasn’t joking! I really want to know what you all have experienced. I’m left to speculating as to why no one is sharing. Either a) you think I’m lame and are boycotting my LAME lameness by not commenting, or b) you can’t think of any way to say what you want to say about Canadians/Americans without violating my “play nice and no insults” rule, or c) there ARE no discernible differences between the two countries (and I really don’t think that is the case).
So I’m asking nicely now. Please share your wisdom! This blog is all about shades of gray so I’m sure we can find ways to share observations without judging the citizens of entire nations. Don’t make me start calling on individual names, because I can and I will!
Also, one more thing…I am more than a little concerned about one particular American custom. I understand that the majority of Americans wear their shoes in their (and other people’s) homes. I am getting a bit uptight about the idea of footwear! in the house! I have SO MANY QUESTIONS about this very foreign (to me) practice. Like what do people do in poor weather? Do they just wipe their shoes the best they can and then go in? Do they stay off carpet? Do they have “indoor shoes”. Don’t they sell slippers in America? Will I be shunned or thought of as rude or bizarre if I ask people to remove their shoes in my house? Will people be offended if I remove my shoes when I go to their homes?
This post over at Notes to Self got me thinking about the whole thing and I posted my questions as a comment. I was interested by a few different responses. Kyran (who authors the blog) suggested that “…In the South, some people have a stigma about going shoeless, because it is associated with poverty (think “barefoot hillbilly”)”. Another commenter posted that, having always worn shoes indoors, bare feet seemed kind of intimate to him and that he would feel very uncomfortable with the no shoe scenario. Upon reflection, this does make sense to me. It’s all about what you’re used to.
Personally, I would feel like I was being very disrespectful by wearing shoes in another person’s home. But I can understand how another person with the opposite experience would feel “naked” without their shoes. Now my concern is how to navigate this world of “shoe etiquette”. Several other Notes to Self commenters, coming from a variety of places and experiences, said they had felt that it wasn’t usually a big problem, so long as you asked politely.
I’m thinking perhaps I can write my “shoes-off-in-the-house policy” as an endearing Canadian quirk. What do you think, internets?
June 6th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
Maybe Americans just wash their floors, like a *lot* more often than us Canucks.
June 6th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
I’m glad you posted again because I’ve been thinking about this since your first post, but I didn’t write any of my thoughts down and besides, I feel like I don’t have any clever tips for you.
However, as a Canadian who has been living in America for the past 6 years, I feel obligated and almost pointed out (though not named) to help with this. I do have advice for you in the shoe department, but keep in mind that I’m in the west and you’ll be in the east. I think the west is much more relaxed about everything in general - it’s a slower pace out here than Ontario and the eastern states.
I used to think that all Americans would keep their shoes on in my house and I had considered putting up a cute sign to remove your shoes. Other American friends of mine have done that. It’s not rude and it gets the point across. However, I haven’t felt the need to do it because when we have people over, usually everyone always removes them, or asks if they should since they see us and other guests shoe-less. Especially if you have a basket or shoe rack of some sort by your front door, it reminds people that you’d prefer their shoes off. We never get snow, but it does rain here 90% of the year. If their shoes are wet, or if they’ve been running around in mud, people know to take them off. I can’t imagine people would walk around with muddy/slushy/wet shoes in their homes. I think people (even Americans!) use common sense when it comes to dirty-ing up other’s floors. There are times at other people’s houses when I notice people do leave their shoes on, and it’s usually when it’s nice outside, and their shoes go with their outfits. At any rate, I think you’ll have no problem pulling off the Canadian trump card whether you are in another person’s house or having people in. I have used that one often.
It’s hard getting used to the different labels in a grocery store. You thought getting used to milk in a bag was tough…! Well, I admit, that one is kinda weird even though I grew up with it like that. Butter comes in four 1/2 cup cubes, not one pound blocks. Good luck with the brands, though. Everything looks different.
Everyone, once they know you are Canadian, will catch you and remind you of saying “eh” and will look to you every time the word Canada or anything associated with it comes up. They expect you to know absolutely everything there is to know about Canada, including holidays such as Boxing Day and the reason for celebrating Thanksgiving in October (if they ever hear about those holidays). An aside: you can tell anything you want to about Canada to these dear American folks and they would believe you. A friend once believed me that we have fold up snow shoes that fit in our pockets and pop out whenever we need them to trek from one person’s house to another. And that same friend also believed me that we all have a secret sign that we use when passing another Canadian car on the road, a hand sign in the shape of a maple leaf, to let the other drivers/passengers know that we are also Canadian.
And many of my friends believe that Boxing day is the day when everyone rushes the streets and straps on boxing gloves to hold boxing matches all day long.
One time, a couple asked me what Canadians in general thought of Americans and I made the mistake of saying something about how Canadians hate Americans. I received a look of utter shock and horror, and not too much longer those friends dropped off the face of the earth, never to speak to me again. I recommend keeping those kinds of thoughts to yourself. I didn’t mean that I (the Canadian) hated them (my American friends), but apparently that must be what they thought.
I can’t really think of any major cultural differences at the moment. If I can think of anything else, I’ll add more to this. I’m sure you’ll do fine! Somehow I have survived and you are much smarter than me!
June 6th, 2008 at 8:16 pm
Thanks for the tips Cheri! You were definitely one of the people on the list that I was ready to start harassing.
It will be interesting to see how similar or different my experience will be on the east side of the country. Thanks for sharing! I really appreciate it.
June 6th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
I’ve found that people take their shoes off in the houses I’ve been in. I was surprised to find that in Maui the thing to do is leave your shoes outside the house, out where it can rain or people can take them. (No one took my shoes - not a big surprise, I guess. Shoes can be gross.) I think they do it to keep the sand outside.
One thing that struck me in North Carolina was the amount of hugging going on. Almost any kind of parting was accompanied by hugs. And many greetings, too. Maybe my family just doesn’t hug much, but I found it strange.
I find the small towns to be kind of fascinating. Away from the major roads you can find places that seem almost untouched by the modern world. You have to carry cash, because there might not be any ATMs and they might not take credit cards.
It’s true, I’ve met many people who are fascinated by Boxing Day, and many people who think we don’t celebrate Thanksgiving.
It took me awhile to figure out the banking. The ‘debit card’ exists here in a slightly different form. My ‘debit card’ is actually called a ‘VISA check card’. Sometimes when I use it at a store I punch in a security code, and sometimes I sign a receipt, and sometimes neither.
People have debt from medical expenses.
In some states you only put your license plate on the back of your car.
There are lots of really cool parks to visit, like the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Yellowstone, and Glacier.
Public transportation is not so good. Even in Alexandria, just a few miles from DC, buses don’t run very late into the night and they often come about as frequently as they did in South Porcupine.
Public radio is called NPR, for National Public Radio. There are some great radio programs, like “This American Life”.
You can fly between major US cities for not very much money at all, compared to the cost of tickets between Canadian cities.
That’s all I can think of! Maybe I’ll think of some more later.
Oh, one more - you can buy books from amazon.com for super cheap and have them delivered almost immediately. I think in general it’s much cheaper and faster to order things in the US than in Canada.
June 6th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Wow, thanks for all the info! That’s very interesting. I have heard that Boston has a really good public transportation system, but I’m sure it’s not the case with all cities.
Oh and not all provinces in Canada are required to have both front and rear license plates. Saskatchewan doesn’t require it, for example!
June 6th, 2008 at 11:58 pm
Long time reader, first time commenter…
I don’t ask people to take their shoes off because we have blah carpet. When we eventually replace it, I probably will ask folks to take their shoes off.
My daughter has a nice brand new house and keeps a basket of “footies” (short socks) by the front door for people to wear cause she does ask that they take their shoes off.
Im not sure where you are in Canada exactly, but you will probably notice a big difference in diversity in Boston. (More of it)
You will probably be aware of a lot more crime in the US than you are used to.
And lastly, the biggest downer is health care. There isn’t any. If you get it through your job, fall on your knees and be thankful. I’m 46 years old, have diabetes and no health care. My estimated life span at my current rate of health is 63 years old. If I had health care available, it would be around 80 years old.
See you on this side of the border…
June 7th, 2008 at 4:48 am
I don’t expect there will be too, too much culture shock; Boston is very liberal and diverse.
I don’t allow shoes on my carpet, ever, for any reason and not because of tradition but more so because: GROSS. Have a bout or nine with MRSA and you become painfully aware of how wrong it is to grind everything you have stepped in throughout the day into the carpet you typically walk on without socks and/or allow your kids to crawl on. Not that I am um, passionate about it or anything, heh. A pleasant sign at the door does the trick nicely and I’ve yet to have anyone complain (directly to me anyway).
You will be fine, Welcome to Uh-merrr-ca
June 7th, 2008 at 11:01 am
I am a British person who has a blog all about removing shoes in homes. You might want to take a look.
I have never been to America, but from what I have heard it is becoming more common for people to require shoes off.
Don’t be afraid to insist on shoes off at the door.
June 7th, 2008 at 11:02 am
Sorry, I forgot to give a link to my blog. It is worth a visit if you are interested in the subject.
June 7th, 2008 at 11:08 am
Not sure what I can say. I have never lived in the States but did live in a border town. Unfortunately, that means the line between what is “American” and what is “Canadian” is somewhat blurred. When we cross it is usually for cheaper gas, cheaper liquor and for some of the food we can’t get in Canada (stupid things like chip flavours and cracker flavours and fun coffee flavours). Until we got a Starbucks in Fort I used to cross for the good lattes too. They have much bigger serving sizes at the restaurants. My mom and I have had to share before because there was soo much food (yet the prices are about the same if not a little lower). They don’t have Clamato juice (only a problem is you like Cesaers). I think that is all a have.
Health care is the big one. My roommate did a one week elective and was both impressed by the fast service and resources and appalled by the poor service of the people that can’t afford it. She had trouble understanding the big divide between the people covered and those not covered. She had some really devastating stories.
About the shoes . . . they don’t take shoes off in Ireland and England either. But then they also don’t get the snow we do. I used to get funny looks when I took my shoes off until I told people I was Canadian. My friend in Oxford asks people to take shoes off and people usually don’t mind. I’d imagine people in the States will be equally if not more understanding.
June 7th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
I grew up in a home where you were not necessarily required to take off your shoes at the door. However, that only applied in the summer months. Often my mom and dad would wander around in there shoes or sandles in the house so it was not un-common for the kids to do it either.
I recall my mom complaining profusely that someone (probably my father) was bringing mud into the house (at which point I would always check my shoes to make sure it wasn’t me and announce my innocence).
I think it is perfectly fine to wear *clean* shoes in the house. I preferred “shoes on” in my home that had hardwood, especially in the summer months because bare feet do more damage to hardwood than I would like.
June 9th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
Hey Shannon,
I have a friend who lives in Montana but went to Briercrest College and to the Seminary. Since she has spent a significant amount of time in both countries, I asked for her advice on culture shock for you. This is what she had to say:
“…Actually, I’m sure there would be way more culture shock between Montana and Boston than between Montana and Sask! There’s a huge East-West coast cultural divide, just like eastern Canada. And that includes the name of pop - here in the west we call it pop, in the south they call it soda, in Canada they call it coke, and I have no idea what they call it in Boston. I really can’t say for certain what she’ll face because I’ve never been on the northeast coast.
A few things I’ve noticed - we don’t take our shoes off when we go in a house unless there is white carpet or our shoes are noticebly dirty. Of course our patriotism is insanely higher. We don’t have gravy on our fries - or poutine (just ketchup). We don’t have exotic potato chips (pickle) or most of the Cadbury bars. We say “huh” instead of “ay” and “restroom” or “bathroom” instead of “washroom”. We tend to be more conservative but that is DEFINITELY not the case in the northeast - that is VERY liberal. Our food and gas prices are way lower. Health insurance is often a problem. Be prepared for horrendous ignorance about Canada…”
So, again with the shoe thing, eh? ;p
Hope this helps a little. I’m looking forward to some interesting letters from you guys once you get settled in.
Love,
karla…