oh no you didn’t

Oh, yes I did. I went out and got me a brand new sunburn today, the first really hot day of the season. Even though I was only out for a couple of hours. Even though I was wearing sunscreen, SPF 50. My shoulders are the colour of trashy red lipstick.

The sun and I have a complicated simple relationship. I do not get “kissed by the sun”. I get violently raped by the sun. Several times a season. And then I go back to him like an abused lover and let him do it to me again because it’s my fault that he beats the ever-loving crap outta me. He doesn’t mean it. He said he was sorry. He promised he’d never do it again.

Right.

Because I’ve only been through twenty-seven summers. You can’t expect a person to change overnight, ya know. You can, however, expect me to be showering very gingerly for the next few days and wearing loose clothing. Here’s to summer number twenty-eight and a rousing bout of skin cancer just to let me know I’m alive   turning over a new leaf and increasing my vigilance over my skin   sunscreen scientists inventing SPF 2389746328977346 everything staying exactly the same.

4 Responses

  1. Daryl Says:

    While I was in California one of the students on the trip burned very easily like you do, however, she found SPF 95 and that did the trick of keeping her protected.

    I heard there are shelters for women like you who need help. I hope you can find it. 27 years of abuse is alot for one women to deal with.

  2. J.B. Says:

    I’ve just given up on sunscreen — the kids included. If we’re out for more than 30 minutes, we put on something to protect our shoulders, and a hat. (The first 30 minutes is for the vitamin D. Ha!)

  3. Meatfest: Cancelled at Living in the Gray Says:

    [...] week in “Oops, I did it again!”: Because we are nothing, if not consistent, in our inability to remember to apply sunscreen. Filed under [...]

  4. Julia Says:

    Ahh…the first sunburn of the season. Nothing like keeping up with tradition. ;)

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