Dear Diary,

I feel as though I am living under the tyrannical rule of Big Brother around here! I am unable to conduct my research without frequent interruption by authorities. Preliminary testing would seem to indicate a connection between my desired activities and the phrase “no-no”.

I originally determined the phrase to be a title for certain activities (ie. climbing the furniture/bookshelves, writing on the wall, eating coloring materials). I’ll admit that I was surprised that the same phrase applied to so many activities. However, after several (read: one dozen or more trials per day for the past 2 months) trials I am beginning to wonder if I have been mistaken. When uttered, the phrase “no-no”may actually be indicating a negative reaction towards my activity! Imagine that!

I am beginning to suspect that my current habit of announcing my planned activity by carefully saying “no-no” several times is actually contributing to my speedy capture. They are so fast I can barely climb a nightstand before being apprehended! It’s quite disturbing. Although I have been diligent in communicating my displeasure with them, the authorities seem not to be at all moved to allow me to continue. I am at a loss, dear diary.

In upcoming trials I believe I must attempt to complete my mission in silence. Easier said than done, dear diary, as I have recently added a delightful word “down” to my repertoire and I am eager to use it. Perhaps if executed while atop a bookcase, it will bring me success?

Another day, another tantrum. Until tomorrow, diary.

The one year old.

PS – New trials are about to commence. They involve testing a scream which sounds very much like a yowling hyena having his leg sawed off and it’s effect on other human-persons. I am very much looking forward to this new experiment. Stay tuned for more information.