Ten ideas to keep baby busy while nursing…

…besides, you know, EATING.

1.  Stick one arm straight up in the air like a flagpole.

2.  Bite.

3.  Cry.

4.  Maul your mother with free hand, yank on clothes, jewelry, poke her in the eyes/nose/teeth, stuff your ENTIRE hand in her mouth.

5.  Kick like a  goat who is about to be cooked for dinner.

6.  Bite.

7.  Stop eating and turn around to make sure the world is still there.  Resume eating. Repeat every 10 seconds.  Observe how long it takes your mother to completely loseWeight Exercise it.

8.  Blow “bubbles” (or zerberts/strawberries, whatever you call them) right on your mother’s boob.

9. Spit up.

10.  Oh, and there’s always biting if everything else gets old.

2 Responses

  1. anonymous Says:

    I have a really disgusting nursing story. Noah’s been struggling with a cold lately and has been up three or four times a night. One morning (a few days ago) I got up and went to the bathroom to take a shower. I took off my clothes and was shocked to find a large, green and brown discolouration all over my boob. At first I thought I had contracted a terrible disease, but on closer inspection, I found that it was really just a massive booger curtousey of my four month old. Nursing. It’s magical.

  2. livinginthegray Says:

    I know! I can’t believe there are women in this country who DON’T want to breastfeed until their kids start school!

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